Queries & Responses

Q. Whilst driving in Cambridgeshire a young driver pulled up beside me, wound down his window and hurled a sentence of abuse at me. Should I have retorted or just ignored his rude outburst? Peter Beales, Northamptonshire

A. Fudds: Fire back old chap. Shout back something along the lines of "I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid!"

Q. When I return home from work I give my wife a kiss, have a five minute chat with her and then pour myself a glass of wine and relax. Usually I catch up with the news or watch some sport on TV. All of a sudden my wife wishes for us to allocate one hour an evening to sit down for a one to one chat. Is this a good idea? Andrew Gavens, London

A. Fudds: Never complicate your relationship by trying to communicate with each other. If you do - you’ll need more than one glass of wine old boy.

Q. Is it correct etiquette that if two couples are travelling together in a car that both the women should travel in the back seat, whist the men sit in the front? M.J.Warren, Dorset

A. Fudds: These days who is to say that two couples will be made up of two men and two women?

Q. Is it rude to make "blonde jokes" in front of blondes? Claire Spicer, Hampshire

A. Fudds: Not at all. I knew a lovely blonde girl back in the sixties and one Christmas her father gave her a pair of water-skis. I hear from friends that she is still looking for a lake with a slope.

Q. I have a several old pewter tankards, but I don’t know the correct way to clean them. Have any of the Stereo Tipsters got any words of wisdom? Tony Stuart-Fellows, Shropshire

A. Fudds: Fill with beer, drink it and drain. Repeat the process as necessary, what.